Food Fashion and Flow: True Colors   

Monday, May 16, 2011

True Colors

This is a very special post and I apologize that its such a long one. I wanted to write about being happy. Exactly one year and three weeks ago today, I was diagnosed with Leukemia. That is a life altering word. Leukemia. At that monent, the things that I thought were so important  meant nothing to me. I no longer cared about what people thought of me, or how much money I had in the bank or in my retirement plan. I could only think of one thing.

I could die.

And then I started thinking about what I might miss, like seeing my son dance at his wedding reception, or one day holding my grandchild and teaching him or her about the joy of cooking, the way I do with my son right now. I thought about my younger years and all of the time I wastred worrying about what other people thought, or trying to live up to impossible standards.  After that grim diagnosis, I took a trip with
two of my closest friends and tried to forget about the diagnosis, but I kept thinking about losing my hair and going through chemotherapy re-emerging as a bald, frail shell of my former self.

I wouldn't be human if I didn't have those thoughts. I might sound melodramatic, but the very thought of laying in the ground in a wood box with dirt as my blanket, twisted my mind into a pretzel.

I continued life as normally as I could and had only shared the news with my mother and a couple of other people.  I went to work every day trying to pretend like nothing was wrong. The thought that kept coming back to me was that I could be knocking on heaven's door and I wasn't ready. There were dreams deferred, places I hadn't seen, my son and I hadn't made home made brioche yet. After three weeks of thinking I had Leukeaia, my doctor told me I had been misdiagnosed.

Three weeks is a short amount of time under normal circumstnces, but an eternity when you think you have a debillitating medical condition. Those three weeks felt like thirty years to me. So the facts were in, I was misdiagnosed.

Do you know what that meant? I now had another chance to go back and live life more fearlessly. So I am jsut happy to be here. HAPPY! Do you hear me? Ok, so what does happy look like?

It looks like me in a colorful dress enjoying a beautiful day of sunshine!

I wanted to put on something bright, colorful and pretty to rreflect the joy I have on the inside to be here
another day. Can you feel my joy?

I hope you continue with me on my journey back from what was a devastating 2010, as I blog about the things I am most passionate about. These things are a part of my healing process. I hope that you come along for this journey so that we can look fabulous, cook amazing food as I share my recipes, and you can listen to me flow about the things in life that move me.

This is my food, my fashion and my flow...

Dress: Steinmart, Purse, LA Fashion District, Shoes: Urban OG

"I see your true colors shining through, I see your true colors, thats why I love you, so don't be afraid to let them show, true colors are beautiful like a rainbow"

This song by Cyndi Lauper is the song I have sang to my son every night for the past two
years and now he looks at me with his big brown eyes and sings this to me. And then he says: "Mommy" and I respond, "Yes Sweetheart?" and then he says " I see your true colors mommy"

Happy Monday Lovely Ones! The world is your oyster! 



Emma said...

You Look Fabulous! I Love everything about this outfit, especially those shoes! I am so glad that you are ok. Living life to the fullest is so important. My Mom died of cancer at a young age so I always make sure to enjoy every moment of my life. Simple things like a walk on a sunny day or that first cup of coffee in the morning are simple joys that I Love. I am so happy for you and keep up the great work with your blog. I Love it! You are a very vibrant woman and you are an inspiration.

(Fashion.MakeUp.LifeStyle) said...

WOW you had me tearing reading such an amazing an inspiring post. So sorry you had to go through such hard weeks but I'm so glad you were misdiagnosed and Enjoy your life to the fullest and you're so right about not caring what other people think..let them judge as long we're happy within ourselves and love by those around us nothing else matters.
You look gorgeous by the way and you're an amazing, strong and passionate woman. Kuddos to you doll.


danniekate said...

this was such an amazing post. one of my family friends had leukemia when she was very little, and she fought through but she's ever so weak physically, but she's so peppy and bright! i love your bold colours :) xx

thewildcherry said...

You look great and you feel happy - what can be better?
Thanks God you're ok.


Mary Lane said...

Great post! Glad you're doing well, and yes, we CAN feel your joy. Keep it up!

R AL Naimi said...

you look amazing loving everything about your outfit Specially the dress <3 <3 <3 it

downtownchicagobarbie said...

What a beautiful post. Your post made me think of things differently. You are so right about putting things in prospective. I'm happy you are doing great. I think most people would have had the same thoughts you had when you were diagnose. I hope you have a wonderful bless day.

Bonnie said...

I cannot tell you how much I adore this outfit because there are literally no words for it. This may be one of the best blogger outfits I have ever seen. For real.
Also, I know exactly how you feel because I was diagnosed with liver disease at 19 years old, and my first thought was, "I'm going to die." A 19-year old is not supposed to be diagnosed with cirrhosis.
It has made me appreciate every single day, and I have learned that it is important to make every day count and to be happy. <33 It's sad that it takes something so awful to learn such an important lesson.
I guess we have something in common. :)
Twitter: @GlamKitten88

Jayme and Mendi said...

I have goosebumps! You are beautiful on the inside & out. So happy for you that you're in such a wonderful place now in your life. You have an amazing attitude & are an inspiration to us all!

Also, thank you so much for all of the support you have shown our blog!

Let's continue to chat & share the blog love with each other!!

Jayme & Mendi @ Her Late Night Cravings

Jayme and Mendi said...

Oh and if you are ever in Richmond VA or if we make it out to LA then we need to "meet up" and share some food, fashion and flow! :-)

Jayme & Mendi

Catina said...

I'm SOOOOOOO happy you're ok. This was by far your most inspiring post. Tears welled in my eyes as I was reading and i realized that everyone is going through something. But the outlook you chose to adopt is simply amazing and very courageous. Good for you girl are my hero :-)

LV said...

Thank you to all of you for your kind words! You are all amazing! Jayme and Mendi, yes ABSOLUTELT!

Mom Fashion World said...

Nice post, Dear.
I'm happy to see that you are happy.
I love the shoes, btw.

Shasie said...

Wow...what an amazing story. I couldn't imagine being misdiagnosed with Cancer. That is such a terrible disease and for them to get it wrong and put you through all that stress, but the good thing is you were misdiagnosed, and you don't have it! And I love how you celebrate the anniversay of the scare with bright happy colors and a smile!

Live Life in Style

Meagan said...

I am so glad you were willing to share this with your readers. I can't imagine how terrifying that would be but I bet you don't take anything for granted now and appreciate every moment...and that's a beautiful thing!

Sarah said...

This was such a genuinely inspiring post, and it encouraged me to live life to the full and not sweat the small stuff. Thank you for sharing your experience, I'm glad it has worked out for you, and I wish you all the luck in the future.


Jennifer Jane said...

love the shoes, the colour is great, very lemon sorbet.

Alex Matoshko said...

OMG, I can't even imagine going through what you went through! I realize that such things as misdiagnosis happen, but still - it's so cruel! But it's all behind you now so very happy for you. You're beautiful, glowing and that floral dress and color-blocking shoes turned you into one golden ray of sunshine :)


Sizzle and Zoom said...

Beautiful outfit you put together. I love you in yellow. Love your sources. Great, inspiring post.

Lauren at Keep It Sweet said...

Wow, I can't believe what your doctor put you through... but I love what you learned from it. That dress is lovely and bright and looks happy!

CEO(angie stone) said...

I must say when you shared your diagnosis with me...I had all the faith in the world that you would be okay. I could not imagine that God would take his "Angel" this soon, because you have so much more to offer the world.
This is only the beginning. Your post is truly inspiring. The things in life that we think are so important are diminutive. Society has taught us that being average is no longer acceptable. If you do not have the money, cars or the big house then you rank low on the totem pole.
Everyone seems to forget about “health”, “family”, “friends.”, “integrity”, “love”, etc

I will continue this journey with you, and do not worry, whatever you decide to share, it your blessing-blessing others who may not have the courage to open up.


vanda said...

Indeed, you look gorgeous!!! The dress is SO beautiful and the yellow shoes and bag are so great!!! You are a vey beautiful woman!

mestizay said...

I really love your outfit!
It's so Vibrant and FUN!
You look AMAZING!

I hope we could follow each other!

Anonymous said...

Hi LV, You tapped a vein. It has something to do with gold and blood, value and life. Love the yellow shoes and the yellow purse with the dress. I saw a dress today that was totally different but feels the same for me, technicolor. Now I am thinking about going back and getting it. What's that all about? You're so happy, it makes me want to spend money!; )

Jocelyn Ng said...

This is a very great post. So inspiring!
I like your shoes anyway! :)

Like Mousse Au Choco said...

Goosebumps !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HALLELUJAH thank God !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! im so f.cking happy for you... i had tears im my eyes, damn woman,god loves u...
your outfit is full of joy,u r shining.......kiss u my dear

Fashion Meets Food said...

Oh My!!!! Your dress is absolutely gorgeous and I love the pop of yellow with your pumps. You look stunning!!!!


Storm said...

Thank you so much for all the love, i'm so glad you visited.
by the way, this is once again - really great and inspiring!

GINA BIBER said...

Yikes, I'm sorry for the 3 weeks of unnecessary stress and tears that caused you.

You look beautiful. Take this new shot at life as an opportunity to get to know Jesus so that when it is your time, you'll be ready.

The very best to you and your son,

BobbieAustin27 said...

Love this outfit, its cool how you paired the yellow pumps with the multi color dress
its not too much it works just right
now following :) maybe you can follow back?

Bella said...

I'm happy, you're ok! :) You look fabulous!!! Love that dress! :)
Thank you for your lovely comment!! :)

karmi said...

You have great style :) !

Gabrielle said...

Love your yellow bag!

Dhalia Rodriguez Edwards said...

Super cute clutch.


Chelsea Elizabeth. said...

You look amazing, I LOVE those yellow pumps. This is something I think about often. I try not to take anything for granted and love everything I can and just be myself!

<3Chelsea Elizabeth

wilybrunette said...

happiness looks hot on you lady! so glad you've gotten this second lease on life and get to spread your joy so freely!

dinamita.paquita said...

Very well done!!
I celebrate with my best friend every year her 2 anniversary, her birthday, and the lymphoma free year....

Jaci Walker said...

Love the outfit!

I have a giveaway on my blog. Please check it out. Link to giveaway here!


dolceedamara said...

Lovely post! Lovely outfit!

Ivana said...

What an amazing post! Your joy of life is visible all around: in your words, in your outfit, in your smile! Happiness suit you so well!

xx Ivana

Ambyr said...

Thank you for sharing your story... I can't imagine the emotional rollercoaster that both sets of news brought. Way to be strong.

I love your yellow heels, so flattering with this outfit!


Gabriella said...

Wow, that's an amazing an inspiring story! Glad to hear you were misdiagnosed. You look super gorgeous and happy in these pictures, loving your blog! :)

<3 Principessa Gabriella

Kenny said...

Thanks for sharing your story. You look beautiful and full of life. Life is short enough without those scares coming along. Well - thank heavens for false alarms and to those who are lucky enough to have them. They remind us all just how precious life is and to make the most of every day we have. Travel, Love, Eat, Live how you want to live.

Juanette said...

I'm sure that was a harrowing time, so glad that it was a mistaken diagnosis.

Loving those yellow shoes!

raven said...

*snap* Work *snap* it *snap* OUT!!!!

You are the epitome of beauty and strength!! I don't wish such a (mis)diagnosis on anyone, but it's apparent that it definitely catapulted your outlook on life in a positive way - you are RADIANT!! Live it up ;)


Alci said...

Love this photoshoot.. so colorful! And those shoes are to die for! I found you on IFB!

Joyful said...

Oh my dear, my heart was in my throat as I read this post. You can't imagine.

My dear sister died of lymphoma about 11 1/2 years ago. How I wish the doctor misdiagnosed her because she had small children. How happy I am for you that he did diagnose you and you have a chance to be happy and see your son grow up. Life is precious. And I am comforted by the fact my sister is no longer in pain and some day I believe I'll see her again.

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